Sunday, April 18, 2010
His family is into camping and outdoor-sy stuff and he was a dedicated Eagle Scout that loved a good campout. So naturally I wanted him to feel that I would support him and our future family by showing interest in camping.
I was lying through my snooty white teeth.
In an attempt to right my lie, shortly after we were married I took a camping class at college. We studied ways to build a fire, safety, knots, nature and for the final, we had to go on a three day camping trip in the mountains.
We were instructed to bring our camper pies (You know the meat and potatoes tinfoil wraps-- yuck!) to have an opening meal together as a class. On my way to camp I stopped at Mc D's and grabbed a burger and quickly wrapped it in tinfoil. I ate quietly in the corner while my fellow classmates enjoyed their wilderness food.
As the night wore on I quickly realized that I was going to have to brave the outhouse or explode. I waited until the last possible second and then braved going inside. I approached the hole with mixed feelings. On the one hand, I really had to go. On the other, there was a deep dark hole of abomination that I was not about to straddle. I let out a little shriek of terror and decided that it was a better idea to pee behind a tree a few yards away. I mark that as a particularly low moment in my life.
Then came the horror of sleeping outside, bugs and all, wind blowing and nothing but my thin sleeping bag to separate me from the elements. I froze my tushie off. I didn't sleep a wink.
I tried really really hard but I'll be the first to admit that I officially hate camping!
My idea of camping is sleeping with the window open. You have all the comforts of home mingled with the sounds of nature breezing in through your portal to the outdoors.
Don't get me wrong, I love a good camp fire, some hot dogs and s'mores. But I could do without the outhouses, lack of water and no showering.
To show my ever generous support, I had the mister install a fire pit in our back yard. We can have a camp fire moment anytime we want while still being shower fresh.
That sounds reasonable-- right?
The sad part is, I've kinda rubbed off on my kids. I let them "camp" from time to time by setting up a tent in our front room. They love it and so do I.