Sunday, October 30, 2011

Pumpkin Saga Continued...

The last time we talked, I was in the middle of my Rugby pumpkin crisis.

Just so we are clear, it's usually the Mom that ends up devastated, not the kid.

Case in point.  Rugby's teacher "forgot" who she assigned what to.  Which meant that Rugs got a free pass for bringing in bread instead of cookies.  The down side was, there was way too much bread.  His teacher sent his back home.  He forgot to take it out of his backpack for a few days and it is now two squished flat stale pumpkin bread wads stuck to the bottom of his back pack.

I reported to my son that I paid $7 per loaf for his stinkin' class.  He informed me that I was a ripped off.'re tellin' me, kid.

So coming full circle, some how I ended up with the short end of the stick both times.

Stupid Pumpkin Bread!  I hate you!

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Pumpkin cookies

Rugby produced a note from his back pack this morning announcing that I was to provide cookies for 28 children the next day.  Then he skipped merrily off to school.

I hate his teacher a little today.

Today was not my day to go and hunt down 28 not-homemade-pumpkin-flavored-cookies-in-store-wrapping. Seriously, who even makes pumpkin flavored cookies?  Everyone knows that pumpkin shaped sugar cookies with frosting are way better than eating real pumpkin.

I had stuff to do and things to worry about.  I did not have time for 28 pumpkin cookies.

I made a respectable effort, going to several stores, like a good mother.

I knew I didn't have any more time to spare looking for these freakin' cookies. 

Stupid cookies!

As a last ditch effort, I stopped at a bread shop and purchased a few loaves of chocolate chip pumpkin bread.  I was hoping Rugs would forget what the teacher asked for and shove it in his bag.

No such luck.

My treat choice was deemed a disgrace.  His life was over!  I got to hear all the drama about how he was specifically asked to bring COOKIES not bread.  How was he going to face his teacher?  She was probably going to yell at him.

(....insert major drama here)

I came up with several reasonable explanations.

1.  They are pumpkin cookies shaped into a loaf.

2.  Pumpkin cookies have recently been banned in local grocery stores.

3.  My mother joined Occupy and won't buy that crap cause she is stickin' it to the man.

4.  The teacher sent the wrong note.

5.  Pumpkin cookies are nasty-- duh.

6.  If all else fails throw it on the back table in the classroom and play dumb.

I was pushing for either 1 or 6.  None of these reasons appealed to Rugs.  He is still taking the bread.  I'll be waiting for my phone call announcing world's end at school.

I've finally ruined him.  Ugh, sigh-- that didn't take too long.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Who Farted?

It's UEA this weekend so I'm off doing fun things with the kids.  (Before I moved to Utah, I had no idea what people meant when they said UEA.  It's Utah's version of teachers convention.)

For now I thought you'd enjoy this...

Farts are funny.  They just are.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Out Smarted

The past little while has been a little touch and go with colds going around our house.  Last week I kept my oldest son home with a bad fever.

I sent everyone off to school and after my chores were all done I went to check back in with my son.  His fever was gone and he was all perked up.  I made a game plan decision and took him with on all of my errands so I wouldn't get backed up a day.

He is in third grade so it's been a while since we've had the day to ourselves.  We had so much fun.  We talked and laughed.  We ate treats and had lunch.  It was the best "sick" day ever.  I knew we'd get mixed reviews when his brothers and sisters got home so I told him to keep the majority of our day to himself.

That lasted about 2.5 seconds.

Monday I'm out to lunch and I get a phone call from the school.  My youngest son is sick and needs to be picked up.  I ask in my best sympathetic mom voice, "Is he faking?"  The secretary assures me that he looks pale and is slightly shaky.  So I drive all the way back to the school to find my son pink faced and happy, swinging his legs on the nurse's bench.

We get home and I try to call him out on his fake illness.  He won't budge.  I settle him in and start doing a few things around the kitchen.  Moments later, he sidles up next to me and bats his big eyes.

"Mom, remember how much fun you and Rugby had on Friday?"  I say, "Yeah..."  He turns to me and says, "When does the fun start now?"


Not only was he faking to spend time with me-- I'm the one who basically brought it on myself.  Geez, talk about bad parenting.

It's always feels good to be out smarted by your seven year old.  Ugh!

Monday, October 17, 2011

Mops, lips, cars and more

If you are a crazy mad iPhone user, like myself, you should already know that Friday was a joyous celebration of the 4S. 

If you are like me and do not qualify for an upgrade quite yet, don't freak out.  Go and update your phone with the latest software sync and you will have a pleasant surprise.  New stuff-- and it's way sweet.

If you are one of those stinkin' luckies that actually got a 4S this weekend-- congratulations.  I'm officially jealous!  Boo whaaah!

I also have a list of things you might be interested in that I have recently discovered.

I am a huge fan of the swiffer-- anything.  I have the vac, the mop, the duster, the towels-- all great inventions.  What I don't like is buying all the replacement towels, mops, filters ect.  A few weeks ago I stumbled on this...

I am in love with the O Cedar Pro-mist.  The beauty is, the head is washable and the solution is whatever you want to fill it with.  So if you are an alcohol and water person, or a Mister Clean, or even a Pinesol person-- it doesn't matter. Awesome mop freedom!  Free yourselves my mopping friends-- BE FREE!

I have to admit, I'm not a lipstick person.  I don't like the way it tastes.  (No I don't eat it, it just migrates by itself.)  Then my lips dry out and I get those lipstick crease lines.  It's just no worth it to me.  Then on the occasions that I need to wear it, I end up feeling very self conscious.  So I found this...

It's lip stain by Cover Girl.  It doesn't taste AT ALL.  It's like a marker for your lips.  It stays on really well.  It's my new found love in make-up.  If you are not used to seeing yourself in lipstick I recommend trying the nude shade.  It still does a nice subtle color and it's not as shocking for your brain.

Lastly, I stumbled upon a golden nugget the other day.  We were riding in the car as a family, sipping on some smoothies, and one of my kids "dropped" their smoothie all over the car.  It wouldn't have been that bad but the said child kept wiping it around the car to try to "clean" it off.  We pulled over at one of those car wash places with the shampooers and vacuums to clean up.  While we were there we decided to let the kids try a self wash stall for the van.  It was awesome.  They all took turns using the guns to wash the van.  Sudsing, rinsing, it was so cool.  They thought it was so fun and I got a clean van.  Win win.  That doesn't happen too often.  It was a serious bonus.  So next time you need a quick fun activity for the kids, try the self car wash.  It's an adventure.

What's your latest favorite?  I'd love to hear about it.

Friday, October 14, 2011

My Sick Bed

I have a cold. 

It's the kind that likes to linger.

It is nearly undetectable during the day now, but it sneaks up on me at night.

Last night I coughed my brains out.

I didn't get much sleep-- neither did the mister.

I was in the bathroom guzzling cough syrup at 3 a.m.

It didn't help.

So I decided to be a good wife and go sleep in the guest room so one of us could get a little shut eye.

I probably shouldn't have done that because now I know what I'm missing.  It turns out our guest bed is super awesomely impossibly comfortable.  It's also on it's own level which makes it pretty much sound proof.


If you've been following me for a while you know how I feel about a king sized bed.  (you can reminisce HERE)  I think it's vital for a healthy marriage to have a king sized bed.  Everyone needs a little space-- OK.  Just sayin'.

So this morning the mister finds me in the guest room.  I explained my new love for the bed and ask, "Do you think it would be too much to shove two of these together in our bedroom?"  (It's a queen.) From the look on his face, I don't think I'll be getting my request any time soon.
How cool would that be?  If a kid or dog comes in in the middle of the night it would be way more do-able right?  You could sprawl out however you wanted.  (Apparently I'm not the first person to think of this because I found plenty of pictures and blogs about exactly this.  There are some smart people out there-- I'm tellin' ya.)

Pure heaven.

Just think about it.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011


I need your help.

It's Halloween time again and the mister and I have to be something epic this year.

I have chosen this...
The mister, for obvious reasons, has his reservations.  Something about stretchy Zebra pants... blah blah blah.

He would rather be something like this...
I'm pretty sure I'd sweat my guts out in this suit.  Plus anything that has plastic nipples is really not for me.  Just sayin'.

Halloween is a trying time for me.  I am not a person who likes to be scared AT ALL.  I like all the happy fun cute things about Halloween but NONE of the gore and blood business.  I'm a self proclaimed Hallo-wiener. 

One of the few cute things I do like about Halloween is Boo-ing people.  It's a tradition that was made up by really fun people who like cute nice Halloween stuff.  (I just made that up.  But it sounds like it could be true-- right?)  Anyway, what you do is make a really fun treat basket or plate of cookies or something and secretly door bell ditch it to someone you know.  Our kids think it is so fun.  We love doing it.  It brings a little cheer into Halloween and makes people feel loved.  Perfect!  Here is a sample I got from TomKat Studio.

You can download your own copy HERE.  They have a couple of different styles to choose from.

Happy Boo-ing!

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Age-- it's just a number, right?

I don't recall being obsessed with age as a child.

I do remember thinking that the 20's were cool and anything past 30 was old.  But I don't remember worrying that my parents were going to die of old age.

My kids-- not so much.

The other day I heard Rugby telling the other kids, "Mom is probably going to die when she is 30 because that's like practically dead."

In defense of my youthful self I told him, "Um, honey, I'm already 33 and I'm not dead.  I guess I cheated death by 3 whole years."

He looked at me like I had minutes left to live.  I assured him that I would be fine and that 30 wasn't actually that old.

He also feels that my grandmother should be in the record books or something.  When he tells people about her he always leads with, "...she is 89 and she's not even dead yet!!"

Yeah, he's a real ladies man.  He knows just what to say.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Teacher Conferences

We had teacher conferences yesterday. 

I always dread teacher conferences.  It's not what you think.

My children get all A's and they never EVER have discipline problems at school.

So why the dread?

It has become apparent to me that each of my children have dual personalities.  They have a school person and a home person.  I like to test out how much the teacher actually knows my child or rather, the child I know at home.

I asked the first teacher, "So do you notice that she does just enough to get by?"  The teacher responded, "No, she goes above and beyond with her work and participation!  It's awesome!"

You know what's not so awesome?  My toilet is not feeling the same way about her work skills.  Mysterious how that work ethic just sorta comes and goes.

I asked another teacher, "Do you have focus issues with him?"  The teacher acts surprised,"I never have focus issues with him.  He is always alert and paying attention in class."

Not exactly the same reaction I get when asking him to turn off the TV to do his homework.  Not even close to the same reaction I get when asking him for the twentieth time to pick up his dirty underwear.

"Do you think my child is a stress case?"  The teacher looks puzzled, "No, she seems to take everything in strides."

This same kid is flailing on the ground freaking out about all the things she has to do and how it all has to be perfect and how she doesn't have time for any of it.  This happens almost daily.  The teacher is clueless.

The last kid's teacher was shocked that I was concerned about the moodiness of my child and his constant yelling voice.  She told me she couldn't believe it.  This was one of her model students that she uses as an example for the other kids every day.

Same kid at home yells everything he says.  Not in a mad way but in a very loud way.  He is also an extremely passionate kid.  Easily angered and very hard to cajole into doing his homework.

After my meetings I went home and confronted the guilty.

"So you guys save all your crazies for me?!?" 

First kid replies, "Um, yeah mom!  I wouldn't want the other kids at school to think I'm a weirdo!"  Second kid pipes up, "My teacher gives me candy when I'm good and I'm not passing that up!"  I reminded them of all the times that I had given them treats and prizes... I got nothing but blank stares.  Another kid adds, "Well, at school we have to sit in desks and stuff so we have to be good."  I offered to install desks at home that day.  I didn't have any takers.

"This is crap!  I birthed you and I get all the drama?"

Today when I dropped my children off to school, I looked at them a little differently.  I swear I could actually see them transform and put on their school best. 

It's so not fair!

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Target Card

I was at Target today.  (no surprise there...)

The last several times I've visited Target they've been trying to talk me into getting the Target debit card.  I've hesitated because the mister has a strict policy about store credit cards-- I shouldn't have them.  Simple and easy to understand really.

So I decided to take my chances with the mister and just get the dang card.  It really was all about the 5% off.  I can't say no to a sale.  The cashier is having some trouble and explains that she can't sign me up for the card today.  It seems that the computers crashed at Target today and so I wasn't able to get my good deal.

The cashier seemed genuinely upset so I wanted to console her.

I said, "Don't worry, I'm not a stranger to this store.  I'll be back to get the card."

She looked at me with genuine sincerity and replied, "Oh, I know dear.  I see you here all the time."

(blink, blink)

So, my sweet sweet love for Target is apparent to not only the mister, but to random workers too.


I can quit any time-- I swear.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Sweet Talk app

A friend of mine suggested a new app to me.  I downloaded it right away and it's been getting some pretty serious time here in our house.  It gives everyone the giggles.  You have to try it.  It's called sweet talk.

The basic idea is that you have different mouths that say different things.  It's a real hoot.  The best part is-- it's free.  Our favorite is Mama Cita. 

What's your favorite app?

Sunday, October 2, 2011


I am so thankful for Conference weekend.  It means jammies, family time, baking and listening.  I love the way Conference makes my house feel.  I love that it inspires me to be a little better than I currently am.  I love that it gives me an excuse to stay home all weekend and be with my family.  I also enjoy the art of doing two things at once.  I choose to listen and bake.  I crank the volume up on the TV and bake to my heart's content.  My family has been basking in muffins, cakes, pizzas, dinners and jello. 

If you are wondering what Conference is you can check it out HERE.  One of my favorite talks so far was by President Monson.  He has always been one of my favorite speakers.  It makes me laugh to hear his stories and sense of humor.  His dedication to service is his most endearing quality. 

So today I'm asking you, "What can you do for someone else this week?"  I love to serve other people.  It makes me feel like I'm making a difference.  No matter how big or small-- step it up.  Go out of your comfort zone and help someone else this week.

Service is kind of like a huge mosaic.  If you look at one piece, it's not very impressive.  But when you look at all of the "little pieces" together, it's a masterpiece.  Service, no matter how big or small-- it all adds up.

What can you do?
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