Monday, March 29, 2010

Meet Goob

This is my son Emerson; he is 5.  We call him Goob around our house because he is a total goober.

My parents keep telling me to stop calling him goober because it will stick.  I've thought about it and I just can't help myself.  He is such a goober!! 

A little while ago, I took Goob to the dentist with his sister.  We are sitting there making small talk with the hygienist while his sister is getting her teeth cleaned and Emerson starts doing the potty dance.

Me:  Em, do you need to go potty?

Goob: No, do you need to go potty Momma?

Me: No

Goob:  Well, I have to check because you pee your pants all the time! 

Me:  What?  (I give him the death stare) No I don't!  Stop talking silly buddy. 

Goob:  Yeah you do Mom.  You pee your pants all the time!

Me:  Em, you know I don't now pleeease stop it!  (more death stares with clenched teeth)

Goob:  Mom pees her pants!  Mom pees her pants!  Mom pees her pants!

I am completely mortified because not only do I NOT pee my pants but the more I try to deny it the guiltier I look. 

My son is being a total moron and embarrassing the heck out of me!  I so wanted to freeze time and smack him in the head.  But instead I smile and pretend that my son isn't being a total goober and try to distract him with my shiny ipod.

The worst of it is; I know this won't be the last time he makes me feel like a complete idiot.  Goob will live to strike again another day.  Ahhh, the subtle joys of motherhood.





No, really... I don't pee my pants.  Geesh!

4 comments:

Brenda said...

Oh, he's only 5, wait until he is in Jr. High and he will be mortified that he even has a mother. Every time you open your mouth, he will cringe in embarrassment - ah, sweet revenge.

iammommahearmeroar said...

It's okay. Lots of adults pee their pants, Lec. I don't know any, but I'm sure you're not alone:)

kristen said...

Did he watch "Happy Gilmore" or something? "It's cool to pee your pants." I am sure he didn't see that, but that is my husbands favorite line from that movie. Didn't Z one time try to convince you that she had poop on her elbow or something? Silly kiddos.

Shauna said...

OMG thank you! I just totally LOLed!!! Honestly though have to never laughed so hard just a little pee pee escaped! hahahah....sorry....don't answer that ;)

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