Monday, September 26, 2011

The perfect baby shower gift

I have four kids.  I consider myself to be some what of a veteran when it comes to babies.  When it comes to baby showers, I always have conflicted ideas as to what I should buy the new mother to be.  Here is a short list of things I have considered.

1.  Duct tape and a leash  (Do you know how many times I've wished for that?)

2.  Sound proof head phones (Have 'um-- better yet, I use 'um.)

3.  Hand sanitizer and bleach (I think this is self explanitory-- eew!)

4.  Shop vac and a steam cleaner (barf, pee, poop-- use your imagination)

5.  GPS locator (and duct tape to stick it to the kids' head)

6.  100 binkies (they run away-- it's a proven fact, I swear)

7.  Doubles of all silky blankets (We had 2-- the first was called woobie and the second was called the fake-out woobie.  It totally worked.)

8.  Extra set of keys  (...make that 2 extra sets-- not that I know anything about that.)

9.  A baseball hat and sunglasses (sometimes morning comes a little too soon for public appearances)

10.  A gift certificate to have yourself cloned.  (Seriously, you need 4 eyes, 4 hands, and two brains to keep up with children.)


Sadly enough I usually go with what's on sale at Target.  Just once I'd like to see the reaction to a few of these. 


What would you give?

5 comments:

Mandi@TidbitsfromtheTremaynes said...

Dude, I'd go with the 100 binkies. I am SO SICK OF TRYING TO FIND BINKIES.

Catherine Peart said...

Oh, I could have used ALL of this list! Hilarious!

Kiera said...

the tree car air freshener thingies all blinged out and turned into a necklace...I smelled like rotten milk for ages and would have loved some sparkly pine fresh thing to just toss around my neck...

iammommahearmeroar said...

Totally the 100 binkies. Baden hasn't used one in a year and a half and I just found one the other day. They just magically disappear and don't reappear until you don't need them anymore.

Cheri

jodie noted said...

I'm a fairly new follower of yours and just have to tell you how much I love your blog. I love a blogger with a sense of humor!

This may sound terrible, but I think every newborn should come with a complimentary DVR. Seriously! I know I would have appreciated it. :)

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