The Night Time Potty Routine

Me: Did everyone go potty?

Kids: Yeeeees Mom!

Me: Are you sure?

Kids: Yeeeeeaaah Mom!

****night time routine commences****

3.5 minutes later....

Kid #1: Moooooom....

Me: What?

Kid #1: I have to go potty.


Of course you do....

My Freak Secret of the Day

I cannot pee with the door open.

There, I said it.

I have been married over 11 years and I still have trouble peeing with the door open. I get the stage fright. I don't like anyone infringing on my personal time.

When my kids were little, I would be forced to pee with the door open during the day because you just never know with kids. I liked to be within ear shot. Then, as the kids got older, I started closing the door. Now, my bathroom breaks go something like this...

Me: Running upstairs as quietly as possible so I don't draw any attention to myself.

Kids: They can feel my presence lift from the room. It's their sixth sense I swear.

Me: I make it to the door, shut it, and quick lock it for safety. Business proceeds.

Kids: They get an instant need for my attention.

Me: thump thump thump... I can actually hear them coming for me!

Kids: Moooooooom! I need to talk to you! Are you almost done yet? What are you doing in there? I really need you right NOW! Come on Moooooom!

This all happens within a matter of seconds. It never fails. So, my bathroom breaks are clipped to a minimum. It's no wonder I like a little alone time with the door shut.

Oh, uh wait... excuse me for just a moment, I need to use the little ladies room. Shhhhhh, pleeease don't tell anyone!